Ashton

Mike is back from prison, matts off probation, everyone is back and mostly everything else is lookin up. It looks and i hope it to be a good summer. Peace the fuck out.

I don't think im compatible. I understand you, i can predict it, everything and see just how you think. How you want to portray yourself, dumb. You are all the same, trying to be this image, you are all the shit...right? I can't find anything that understands me, im not trying to impress anyone, but everytime im just talking i feel like people think i am. I don't really like questions but i ask them. I don't know if im mean, maybe i am when i see that certain thing. I can't really explain, but i like what i like, and if i don't, i don't say i do. This only makes sense to me and thats fine, its how it should be. I'm just going to go on, pass by, find what i need, because this shit isn't me. Talking to new people, you try not to be your total self, as to know them, not weird them, then to show them later. Something like that, not sure. When i think about this, i just keep asking questions, maybe i feel this way because of this, or im actaully portraying that, or im not knowledged enough to be able to understand something else, i cant put it all together, just some thoughts. Later.

Home here i coooome.

Everyone, my grad party is on saturday at 2 o'clock. Anyone can come. Its in waterford, so just call me for directions. 248-390-7022. It will be a blast. I would like to see everyone.

This whole time has felt like a dream, its crazy. I'm am so pumped its ridiculous, i hope it all goes well.
If all stays on the right track, i don't think i would be happier.. ever.

As of now i am content with life. My friends are what i need and i love them. Even if some things don't work out, and people i like don't even care really or know or whatev, it doesn't matter, i guess. I like when i can drive home and smile. This is what i need.

If you have a big truck and would like to help me move in a week or two and recieve gas and money for it, please reply.

I'm moving to waterford in three or so weeks, by vp kind of i think...good bye ortonville.

I have the internet back finally...annnnnd its pretty cool id say.

Feeling the pressure set in, reassures i'm going crazy. I think everything is alright, I feel the urge that ive been hating too much. Yet i can't stand it, so much annoyance, i think i just match it with more annoyance to help it out. This lazyness of mine has got to leave. Or i will go down. I think i miss old people, older times, good feelings. Why is everyone so moody and just ridiculous these days? Can't people get over their self absorbing sense of pride. Don't try to be cool...please? Also get over their addiction for fucking up, i don't like watching people go down. I don't like dickheads. Side note: Fuck you, you're so dumb i hate you..get out of my life, you're everywhere i look. Meshing isn't good which adds to that. Where did all the good people go that i knew. When im finally away i might be happy, i might be sad either way it should be better. I wrote this like i was singing it. Another note. Bffs rule.

A big ender to break is sisters, much excitement, if anyone wants to go, please do. The best stocking stuffer i got was Mah Jongg.

How wonderful it is, amazing is all i can say, i'm looking forward to the next day.

This weekend was great, this week is going to be great and im going to michigan state, how awesome.

As of now, it feels like my life is falling apart. Im glad with what is going on, but part of me feels not content, what you said depresses me i don't know anything. Im glad im with my friends right now, if not i don't know what id do, they are awesome

if any of you are going to tv on the radio on saturday, tellll meee.

Kelly, David, Nick and Ryan i love you guys, im glad you are all alive and doing ok, almost gave me a heart attack. I hope you all are good in the long run, what a scary day.

Well lets see here, im unsure about my life sometimes. I think im going downhill, im slowly getting more lazy. Im just kind of going through the days with a slight glossy haze. My escape is my weekend, which is even more blurry. Im also out of balance, i have lots of things going on i can't control, and its bombarding me all at once, i wish i had control. Well tomorrow i get to go to kalamazoo and hang out with my sister, it i also mikes 21st birthday. It will be nice to hang out with her. It was wonderful when she took me out for lunch last week. Im glad im getting away for a day. I think i need to take a step back and look at everything and fix the holes, but obviously i won't, i cna't just do that, im gonna have to ride over them. Ive come to the conclusion that indeed my relatives on each side of my family are.....Fucked Up. I just found out tonight i had an uncle who died at the age of 21 by getting shot, they don't know if its an accident or if he commited suicide. He has seasure problems and i guess was stressed out, oh simon. Its just nuts, just suddenly finding out you have a relative no one tells you about because everyone on my moms side of the family tried to forget about it and hold it in because of the connection it might have with my aunts husband dan. Also how my other aunt on my dads side is prolly a lesbian. I like how no one ever tells me anything and how they never try to work it out or discuss it. Not to mention i found out both my parents were married before they got married to each other. Its just crazy to hear and find out all this information about people you know so closely. There is just so much other stuff, so much drama and small arguments that are held into long grudges that keep everyone distant. Its not very thrilling. I just can't believe everyone tries to forget about Simon and not talk about it. There is just such little tragedies i dunno what to say. On another note there is a cricket cricketing in the corner, and its pretty outside. Ill never figure out how i think.

Happy Birthday to me.

This isn't going to stop anytime soon, i can tell. I always can.

In reply to nick wells' entry, the hmc can fucking burn.